


Barton Rule number ?: Never sleep in the creepy graveyard church

by hopelessly_me



Series: Spoopy season 2020 [5]
Category: Marvel
Genre: Dating Talk, Gen, Hawkeye bonding time, Kate is not a fan, Not Clint's first rodeo, Work Talk, graveyards, mention of Wickling, mentions of Amerikate, mentions of Winterhawk, run down church, story time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-19
Updated: 2020-10-19
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:27:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27110449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hopelessly_me/pseuds/hopelessly_me
Summary: After America told them the scatter, Clint and America find themselves taking cover in a graveyard. If it wasn't for the possibility of vampires, they would not be in the creepy church. Ah well- not Clint's first time.
Relationships: Clint Barton & Kate Bishop
Series: Spoopy season 2020 [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1959886
Comments: 2
Kudos: 14





	Barton Rule number ?: Never sleep in the creepy graveyard church

“All things considered- I’ve slept in worse places,” Clint commented, landing on the other side of an old, creaky fence that he was pretty sure someone could get tetanus from. He watched as Kate dropped down next to him, picking herself up easily enough.

“Yeah… I am currently regretting life choices,” Kate said slowly. Clint wasn’t sure if it was due to their current location or the hit she took earlier, but Kate seemed less than thrilled.

“It’s just a graveyard, Katie-kate,” Clint said gently. “Come on, let’s find a spot to rest while we wait for America to catch up to us, okay?”

Kate seemed stuck in her spot, eyeing the graveyard warily. Clint slung an arm over her shoulders and walked forward, grateful that she moved with him. Clint got it- graveyards could be creepy, especially at night, especially in October with the fog and the crescent moon hanging above. He knew some people were superstitious, and this was the kind of thing that only brought trouble. But they were out of options at the moment. Clint wasn’t sure he wanted to, or could, go much further, and Kate was just as tanked as he was. So he made a decision- it wasn’t like this was going to be his first night spent in a graveyard, and he was pretty sure this wasn’t going to be the last.

“There’s not much cover,” Kate observed as they went.

“Don’t need too much cover,” Clint answered. “We shook them pretty well a few blocks back, and no one is going to think that we are dumb enough to try to hide in a graveyard. Just a word to the wise? Never sleep in the church. It’s somehow creepier than cozying up to a grave.”

Kate turned her head, giving Clint a very odd look. “Exactly how often do you do this?”

“Not  _ often _ ,” Clint said, trying to keep his tone light and airy. “Five times now? Look, I did weird shit when I was in my upper teens and early twenties. Trust me- old churches are weird to sleep in.”

“Okay,  _ maybe _ . But we wouldn’t be vampire prey,” Kate pointed out. It was a fair point. They were trying to hide from vampires so a church was probably extra safe. “... let me guess. Too scared God will smite you if you step in?” she taunted.

Clint blinked a few times and looked down at the perfectly blank expression. He was fairly certain she was taking lessons from Natasha- he didn’t like the two being friends, it made his life harder. “I… I don’t even… shut up.”

The thing about old graveyards like this, where the graves were worn, names barely visible from weather damage, was that Clint knew what condition the church would be in. So when they walked up to the nearly in shambles church, he expected the birds inside, expected bats even, and he hoped beyond belief that neither would actually be in there.

Kate paused right outside, looking at the peeling paint on the door. Her hand reached out, hovering. “... if it wasn’t for the fact there were vampires chasing us, you would have won this round, Clint.”

“Told you. Creepy.” Clint bit back a shout in pain when he rammed his shoulder against the wood to force it open. He signalled for Kate to go in first and he tried to put the door back in place. He took a few steps in and looked around. Just seeing the pews made him exhausted. It was dirty, he was probably going to get an infection, but it was a place to rest his body and that was winning out.

“If you pass out on me, I’m going to kill you,” Kate warned and Clint chuckled, sitting down, sprawling his legs out. It was a few minutes before Kate joined him, sitting nearby. “Were you ever… you know.”

Clint shrugged, letting his arms fall to his sides. “My mom made us go as kids every sunday. Small town- you had to keep up appearances. Guess when you have a rough childhood, you don’t really believe in something all that good.” He rolled his head over and looked at Kate. “Please tell me this isn’t going to turn into something churchy.”

“No.” Kate looked ahead of them. “You going to be okay, Hawkeye?”

Clint smiled and closed his eyes. “I’m fine, better Hawkeye,” he answered. “Pick something less depressing to talk about. Like… hell, I don’t know. How’s Billy and Teddy?”

Clint could hear the smile on her lips when she told him about the two, about their engagement. Kate had a soft spot for a lot of people, but Clint suspected Billy and Teddy were on top of that list. She talked about them like she talked about America. Maybe one of these days she would stop kidding herself because it was so glaring that even Clint could see the mutual attraction there. But it was far beyond him to offer any sort of relationship talk- he wasn’t known to have a stellar track record in that department.

“Clint?” Clint opened his eyes to peek at Kate. “You’re bleeding.”

“Yep.”

“That’s not exactly good,” Kate said flatly.

“What do you really want me to do about it?” Clint asked. “We are hiding in a church waiting for help, no med pack. Want me to pray the blood away?” Kate rolled her eyes and Clint smirked before he leaned forward. “You know what would make all of this better?” Kate raised an eyebrow. “A thunderstorm. Ultra scary.”

“And we would get wet,” Kate groaned. “What are we doing?” she asked, rubbing her face. “We’re Avengers. We should be out there.”

Clint looked back at the front of the church. “Being Avenger doesn’t automatically translate to doing something stupid. You have been watching Steve and I too much. Be like Nat. She’s smart.” Kate gave a small smile at that. “America told us to shelter up. I don’t know about you, but pulling back an arrow right now would suck. So I’m going to sit back in a creepy ass church, lick my wounds, and know that we’ll be out of here soon. America, Quentin, and Gwen got this.”

“It’s weird hearing you admit that Gwen has this,” Kate said with a smirk.

“You tell her I said that and I’m disowning you,” Clint threatened. “You know what sounds good right now? Thai food. Something spicy. Maybe chili. I haven’t made chili in ages.”

“How can you be thinking about food?” Kate asked.

“Because I’m hungry? Aren’t superheroes allowed to get hungry, Katie-kate?” Clint asked. He playfully leaned over against her, pouting. “You should be proud of me that I didn’t pick pizza.”

Kate sighed and scooted down, kicking her feet up against the pew in front of her. “I’d be proud of you if you manage to make it one mission without tearing your shirt,” she quipped.

“For the record, I didn’t tear it. I actually like this shirt, thank you,” Clint corrected. He felt her shoulders give a little shake before he sat back up. “Bucky bought me this shirt. I still don’t know why. He just said it looked like something I’d like.”

“Considering you are wearing it, I’m going to guess he was right.” Clint sniffled for a moment before he closed his eyes. “I think you should ask Bucky out.”

“I’m not asking Bucky out, Steve would kill me,” Clint answered.

“The guy clearly likes you,” Kate argued.

“You clearly like me and I’m not asking  _ you _ out,” Clint replied.

Kate made a noise of disgust. “That’s just gross, Clint.” Clint nodded his agreement. She wasn’t wrong- the thought of it was gross. “I’m serious though. He randomly stops by when he is coming home from missions. He buys you shirts he thinks you’d like. He watches Lucky for you without a bat of the eye. There are worse people.”

“You realize that if I date Bucky then I have a type, right?” Clint asked. “Spies. Natasha- spy. Bobbi- spy. Bucky-spy.”

“You have a type and it’s called anyone who consents,” Kate shot back.

Clint opened his eyes to look at the grin on Kate’s face. He was glad she didn’t look like she was beating herself up mentally anymore, but at his expense was rude. So he did the one thing he told himself not to do. “Oh yeah? I think you should ask America out.”

“I’m straight.”

Clint rolled his eyes before he closed them. “Right. Okay.” He had heard that line many times by people he’s slept with too, or his favorite line  _ I’m experimenting _ .

“And she doesn’t see me that way.”

“Oh  _ god _ , you are blind. I’m taking my name back, you can’t have it anymore,” Clint groaned. “You guys go on roadtrips together. You guys sleep in the same bed-”

“Every girl shares her bed with her friend. It’s girl code, Clint,” Kate interrupted.

“Oh my God, whatever,” Clint said. He reached up with his less aching arm and rubbed his face. “I bet you a pizza and a beer that if you asked America out tomorrow she would take you up on it.”

“How did we get from us talking about your love life to mine?” Kate asked.

“Yours is far more interesting and has a chance of going somewhere,” Clint answered. “Okay so let’s call it as it is. Both of us might kinda sorta like someone, and neither of us is going to do jack shit about it.”

“Sounds right,” Kate agreed. “Is this another Hawkeye rule?”

“Must be,” Clint agreed. “Hey- did I ever tell you about the first time I saw a real life vampire?”

The story was a load of shit, if Clint was being honest, but it kept their spirits up. He wove a story about when he was a teenager, and how it took him three weeks to realize his bitey girlfriend was actually buttering him up for the kill. Kate snorted and laughed, all the while scooting closer until they were pressed up against each other’s shoulders.

“Thank you,” Kate whispered.

“Anytime.” Clint closed his eyes for a moment. “Get some sleep, Hawkeye. I’ll man the fort and wake you.”

It didn’t take much convincing. Kate was asleep within minutes and Clint kept his eyes open, scanning the windows in front of them. He knew his hearing aids were dying, everything was coming in and out. He was relatively sure they were safe here, otherwise he wouldn’t have offered. With a deep breath, Clint committed himself into staying awake at least for a little while longer.

It took three more hours before he saw the blur of a swirl appearing near the altar. The idea brought a smile to his face and a lame joke in his head. Maybe it was a lame joke he could tell Bucky just to hear him laugh and tell him how much of an idiot Clint was; Clint liked the way Bucky said the words so fondly. Clint didn’t think modern Bucky was religious, or if he was he wasn’t to the point where a smartass joke would offend him.

America walked out, Bucky trailing her. That was a surprise for Clint. Clint smiled at them and watched as America spoke before he shook his head. She looked at Bucky who nodded.  _ Trade you. One princess for one assassin _ . Clint grinned and nodded, nudging Kate. America and Bucky both came closer and America scooped Kate up. Kate opened her eyes for a moment and Clint could read America’s lips this time.  _ Sleep. I got you _ . Kate gave a nod and rested her head against America’s shoulder and Clint wished he could take a photo and keep it.

Bucky waved to the two before he sat down on the pew next to Clint, both of them watching as the portal closed. Bucky scanned the room just like Clint had done a dozen or so times since he had been stuck in there. Then he got a grin on his face.  _ Surprised you are not ash _ he signed.

Clint rolled his eyes and huffed dramatically.  _ Can we go? Creepy. _

Bucky nodded and got up, helping Clint to his feet.  _ Why church? _

Clint shrugged.  _ Kate idea _ . Bucky nodded and slung an arm around his shoulders before Clint flinched, and then his arm landed on his back. Clint allowed himself to press against Bucky, just lightly. Maybe he could ask Bucky out on a date- it wasn’t the worst idea in the world. But that was a future Clint problem. Current Clint was going to enjoy the closeness before he got back to a hotel to ice his shoulder.

_ Want to hear a joke _ ?

Bucky raised an eyebrow.  _ Is it a Barton classic? _ Clint flashed him his brightest smile and Bucky’s grin started spreading.  _ I am all ears. Unlike you. _

And yeah- Clint was going to have to ask Bucky out. 

**Author's Note:**

> I just really needed some Hawkeye bonding time. =D They just happen to do it the best when they are hiding for vampires that, obviously, had to rip up Clint's shirt.


End file.
